The Puzzle Principle
One of my favorite movies of all time is "Rocky".
I remember my Dad taking me to see it in a theatre when I was 11 or 12. It was an inspiring experience, to say the least, and I came out of that place fired up and ready to conquer the world ! Of course, when you're that age, a lot of the subtle dialogue and plot developments tend to slip by you (What's with all this talking stuff? Gimme more fighting! More punching!).
And it wasn't until I was much older that I realized there was a moment in the movie that is incredibly profound in the context of relationships. Rocky is talking with Paulie, the surly brother of Adrian, Rocky's girlfriend. Paulie doesn't think much of Adrian and is obviously not happy with these two dating. So he asks, "What is it about my sister that you like so much?"
To which Rocky replies (in the guttural slur that made Stallone famous), "I dunno. She fills gaps."
"Gaps? Whaddya mean gaps?" Paulie says.
"You know, gaps. She's got gaps, I got gaps, together we fill gaps." Rocky states with a shrug.
And at that moment, the beat up, dimwitted character of Rocky Balboa uncovered one the major factors in every successful relationship.
When we give our lives to the Lord, He comes in and fills the spiritual void. But there are other places in our lives that are void as well. We all have needs and wants, places where we lack certain things. And when we're looking for a partner, we're looking for someone who can fill those holes. Someone who can take care of those needs and wants.
Someone to fill the gaps.
Now, don't get me wrong. I'm not talking about a person to do the dishes or pick up the laundry. I'm talking about things inside that we yearn and ache for. Everyone has them. Some are apparent, some not so much. For example…
When Jason and Ronda and started dating, he thought he knew exactly what I wanted in a potential mate. After all, he was 30 years old and had dated a few people in his time (he used to joke that he had test driven enough cars to know the exact make and model he wanted). And Ronda had many of the attributes he was looking for.
So the gaps were being filled and everything was kosher. But then something interesting happened. Jason realized there were gaps inside of him that he never knew about, things he never realized that he needed or wanted. And as the relationship progressed, they became more and more apparent. Sure, he thought he had all these outside parameters established…
…but God knew what Jason REALLY needed.
Ronda came into his life and filled holes he didn't even know were there. And my friend did the same for her. And in the end, many of the things they felt were so important weren't important at all. That's how God works-He knows what we need and He knows how to fulfill that need.
When you're dating another Christian single, you can't just look on the outside. You must look inside at how this person fulfills you or doesn't fulfill you. Your relationship should be like a jigsaw puzzle, the pieces coming together perfectly to make one entity, one voice singing praises to God.
When you do find that special someone, dig deep and really examine yourself. Are they filling the gaps? And are you letting them? Today, Jason and Ronda still laugh about how God put them together to balance each other out.
She's great with money, him not so much. He's a little more easy going, she's more uptight. He's a back-of-the-classroom type of guy; she's a front-and-center student.
See what I mean?
Gap filling. One of God's greatest gifts to a man and woman.
Make sure your pieces fit together perfectly.